If someone asks you for something, only give to them if it raises your joy level or inspires your heart to do so. Never give to impress. Never give to be liked. Proper giving requires an appreciative heart on the other end. Giving should be done because your heart is inspired to do so. Giving to an unappreciative soul is a wasted gift. Giving is a tool that is meant to inspire the giver and the receiver.
You rarely inspire yourself or the world by buying drinks or giving gifts. Give love and heartfelt appreciation, as well as laughter, joy, and inspiration to the world instead of physical gifts and they will love you for it. Or if they inspire your heart then give a physical gift just because you want too.
Remember that proper giving requires two ingredients, appreciation and inspiration. If someone asks you for five dollars but you do not feel inspired then say “I’m sorry I cannot.”
Instead take that five dollars and give it to someone who will receive it joyfully. Do not brag to the world about your good deeds. But quietly enjoy the exchange of love between hearts.
I am reminded of abused women I’ve spoken to in my life. They give and give and give, yet received no appreciation for their gifts. Rather than being inspired by their giving, they instead find themselves drained of joy. This kind of giving ads no value to the world, ads no value to the giver, and offers no incentive for the unappreciative receiver to learn how to appreciate. Save your gifts for those with the capacity to appreciate them. We increase love in the world by wisely choosing who to give our gifts too.
And ladies, appreciation will not always be in the form of a flower or a physical gift. It may be as simple as the little smile on his face when he is around you, or the look he gives you to let you know he appreciates your presence, or the kiss he gives because he wants to feel your feminine energy focused on him for a moment, or the way he hugs you with joy to let you know how valuable you are to him. If you see some form of thankfulness from the reciever, then you are seeing appreciation.
And remember a simple truth, those with the tendency to ask often, tend to appreciate less. When you run across that individual who rarely asks for help, then give willingly and don’t worry about receiving back. And every once in a while give to a total stranger without being asked ..just because. Give a smile, a high five, free hugs, or a sincere compliment.
The good feelings from proper giving are like injections of joy into the soul. And this internal joy becomes the fuel which feeds your confidence, which in turn attracts the world to you.
When I have attempted to explain to some people the power of giving in order to attract, I have found interesting responses. Often times the response will be “No way! I’ve learned my lessons. I have given and given, and simply been taken advantage of.” I completely understand this response. So let’s explore further the difference between powerful giving and weak giving.
Weak giving will not help you draw love or attraction into your life. Weak giving will actually drain you of love for yourself, as well as make you bitter and less sexually appealing.
Weak giving comes from a barter system mentality.
When men give drinks, buy gifts for, spend money, or spend time, FOR THE PURPOSE OF GETTING A WOMAN TO LIKE THEM, this is operating from weak energy. Not because there is anything wrong with doing these things for a woman. But it is WHY you are doing these things that determines if it is from weak energy.
If you do these things because you feel that they have more to offer you than you have to offer them, then it is this feeling that is the problem.
Yet you can hardly be blamed for feeling this way. Because society raised men to feel that the woman has what he wants, that is, the gift of sex and feminine attention.
Now what is interesting about man being in this weakened state, is that it was actually brought about by men of earlier times, egotistically suppressing womans sexual expression.
Before organized civilization, men often made the rules simply because he was physically stronger than woman. So he made woman feel ashamed of desiring more than one man at a time. And he created words such as “slut”, to shame women into submitting to his belief system.
And to this day many women still allow this suppression. And other women support this suppression using similar words. Because if women allow other women to break out of the suppression, then that woman who freely expresses her sexuality however she desires, may cause men to be less needy, which in turn ruins this power game that keeps women in charge, and men needy.
The only problem is that women are hurting themselves and keeping themselves in the same weakened state that the men are in. Yes, they do hold power by withholding their sexual gifts. But it is a power that barters/trades joy for power. Just as men barter for sex, many women will barter for relationship and security.
Bitterness is created in a man, because he hopes that all the time and money he invests in the girl will be rewarded by sex, attention, or sometimes relationship.
Bitterness is created in woman because she hopes that the sex, love, attention, and nice things she does for a particular man will be rewarded by love and relationship. Yet neither of these things come to pass.
For both women and men alike are not attracted to needy energy. Or deception energy, for that matter. For when we give while secretly expecting something in return, this is not true giving, but it is deceptive giving. Or to put it another way, it is pretending to give when in reality, we actually are hoping to barter.
Giving to get things you think you lack, which you believe can only be attained from others, will only lead to bitterness and disappointment. Instead of this mentality, begin to have FAITH in the power of the law of attraction. Giving “THINGS” is not the powerful form of giving that I am trying to share with you.
The giving I am talking about works like this. Ignore physicality and observe personality. If personality of others is down, lift it up with your smile. Tease it a little, make it giggle. Give a high five with loving, leading, powerful, but unegotistical energy. Do this with guys, girls, groups. Offer free hugs to the world with the energy of healing.
Don’t think about “she’s too pretty to want my hug.” Thinking that way means your focus is still at physicality level and your still thinking about how hot and unattainable her body is. That’s phisicality — weak level energy, Stop It!! That body of hers stops most of the world from seeing the beautiful, playful, little girl inside that just wants to smile and giggle and to be paid attention too by a powerful and loving soul. But give the gift away for free. Any thougths about hoping she will like you will ruin this process. Her smile ends the mission of the moment. Move on when joy begins to deminish. Remain in a mindset of giving in this manner.
The only reward you are seeking, is to feel more of the joy that is created from the process of giving joy.
If you want to buy a drink for a woman, do so if her heart and loving has inspired your soul. Or do so if you feel that this woman deserves to feel special in this moment, and it would bring you happiness to do this for her. Or if you feel she just wants to take advantage of you then say “I won’t buy you a drink quite yet but I do happen to have a big loving hug with your name on it. Come here you!”
And women, don’t barter sex for fear based reasons. Don’t barter sex for relationship, or love. Sex should only be given when your spirit yearns to explode with another particular spirit, whomever that may be.
Enjoy the moment because of the moment. Never again say “you owe me this because I gave you that.”
If you want to barter with your sexuality then be upfront about it. It is not the bartering that is a bad thing, it is the hiding of true intentions that causes all the problems. This is true with both men and women. But bartering is more of a business minded subject. And our current subject is not on business but attraction and power-filled giving.
Women, if you think a guy owes you something because you gave him sex then you are still in the weak mentality. DON’T GIVE A MAN SEX UNLESS YOU ARE WANTING IT FROM HIM! And if this is why you had sex then a beautiful moment was created that both adults wanted. So NOTHING IS OWED to anyone afterwards. I hope you are hearing this. This is the beginning of female empowerment.
The victim is the weak mentality of yesteryear. You cannot be a victim when you go after what you want. Now you are empowered instead. Nothing but thankfulness for a wonderful sharing should be expected from either person.
Men do the same thing. “But we had sex! Doesn’t that mean anything to you!” Stop it men! It meant what it meant. It was a beautiful sharing that both enjoyed. Any future relationship, or sex, or non relationship has nothing to do with how beautiful that moment was. That moment should only be used for the mind to return to in thankfulness from both parties that such a beutiful union was allowed to be experienced.
And this remains pure as long as we do not sully it with the unempowered thinking of “how can I get more.” But instead we keep it beautiful and pure with the thinking of “That was beautiful and I am blessed to have experienced it.”
Earlier I said to “have faith in the power of the law of attraction.” What I mean here is that if you will learn to give joy freely, and to insist that you will do your best to make all human interactions result in a win and more joy for all parties involved, then YOUR NEEDS AND DESIRES WILL GET FULFILLED.
Not because some magical fairy will make your life better for being a good person. But because raising joy in the world infuses you with powerful confidence as well as a more energized and interesting personality. This energy will replace the needy energy. And instead of having to look for people who may be attracted to you, those who would be attracted to you will simply pop up out of nowhere. Then you can lead them to whatever mutually joyful place works for both of you.
So don’t chase attraction, but infuse the world with joy from confidence, and attraction will not be able to avoid you.